Five Reasons Israel Blocks Items from Entering Gaza that You Thought were Safe – (Satire)

1. Musical instruments

Let's face it, nothing annoys anyone more than neighbors that play their music too loud.

During the Vietnam war the U.S. Would use frequency generators and amplifiers to play 'the brown note' into the V.C. tunnels before sending in the tunnel rats. The tunnel rats were soldiers who would enter the tunnels and hunt the V.C. who they would come upon while they were experiencing explosive diareah, the effect of the frequency called 'the brown note'Just imagine how things would go sour for you if you were an IDF soldier kicking down a door in Gaza and suddenly the terrorist family of Hamas supporters living there smacks you in the face with the Macarena played on the accordion, bagpipes, and a cowbell. You'd be pooping your mamma's matsa balls in your pants before you'd even digested them.

Musical instruments are obviously serious weapons of mass pant pooping.

2. Crayons

The young whipper snapper millennials will never understand but some of us grew up watching the world's greatest educational programming, Loony Tunes. We might not remember the preamble to the constitution without singing it the 'Schoolhouse Rock' way that hit us in between cartoons but we sure as hell remember how drawing a train tunnel in a cliff face can bring a train out to try and run over our enemies (just don't try to enter the tunnel yourself) and a hole drawn on the ceiling can drop an acme anvil on top of someone's head.

Physics can be weird. Thank God Loony Tunes has taught us the way.

,.. and the word.

3. Cookies

Cookies are a great treat unless they are burnt. That wouldn't happen in a metal shipping container under the middle eastern sun would it? Of course it would. Even famous Amos isn't as black as the cookies shipped into Gaza.

I bet you think these briquets would only sadden the children of Gaza, but you'd be wrong. You see, not only are these cookies as black as a politician's morals, they are also hard as a rock and Palestinian children often throw rocks at Israeli soldiers. It's obviously better if Hamas Jr has to use native Palastinian rocks because at least that way Israel gets more of their land even if it's only one stone at a time.

Even if that's not enough evidence to wake you up to cookie dangers, check out this News report about Iran's female ninja warriors.

None of the news anchors even noticed when reporting this story but Hamas friendlly Iran has really excelled in weaponized cookie development.

4. Fishing rods

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man how to build cybernetic weaponized sharks and you've given him a way to kill you.

The advances in genetic science and robotics are coming to life even as we speak. With just a Roomba and some genetic samples taken from the ocean even you could do it in your basement. I mean not like now, or actually you but, you know,... if you were actually smart.

Even if you have no enemies just try to tell me you wouldn't want a sleek toothy death machine of a land shark like this parked in your garage. I knew you couldn't.

5. Industrial margarine

Thanks to this Palestinian nursery rhyme Israel has had to block butter shipments into Gaza for hundreds of years.

'Betty Ahmad bought some butter, but, she said, The butter's bitter; If I put it in my jihad, It will make my jihad bitter. But, a bit of better butter will make my jihad better. So, she bought a bit of butter better than her bitter butter, and she put it in her jihad and the jihad was not bitter. So, twas better Betty Ahmad bought a bit of better anti-semitism.'

Try saying that without one of their forked Arab tongues!

Although margarine has been around for hundreds of years it gained a much greater market share in the 1980s and this is where things get terroristy. That was at the same time as miracle toast started to appear throughout the United States. A coincidence? Doubtful.


Surely you BDS freaks think it's silly to ban a divine miracle from Gaza but who are God's chosen people? Is it them? Is it you? Is it the Chinese? Is it the left handed lesbian Eskimo midget albinos? No way Jose!

Views: 297

Comment

You need to be a member of 12160 Social Network to add comments!

Join 12160 Social Network

"Destroying the New World Order"

TOP CONTENT THIS WEEK

THANK YOU FOR SUPPORTING THE SITE!

mobile page

12160.info/m

12160 Administrators

 

Latest Activity

Burbia commented on Burbia's group The Comment Section is Closed
"So far, there are 14 comments here for the video about Iran's influence on Generation Z and…"
3 hours ago
Doc Vega posted blog posts
3 hours ago
tjdavis posted videos
17 hours ago
tjdavis posted photos
21 hours ago
Larry Harmen posted blog posts
yesterday
Larry Harmen posted videos
yesterday
Doc Vega posted blog posts
yesterday
cheeki kea commented on Less Prone's photo
Thumbnail

Rebuilding Khazaria

"Perhaps Russia and Ukraine should Rebuild the Tartarian Empire. Then game over. "
yesterday
cheeki kea commented on FREEDOMROX's blog post NEVER FORGET! WHO and UN charged with GENOCIDE in 2009
"This is Why the outlier countries Must Stand Up And Fight Them Off on all fronts at all times. For…"
yesterday
cheeki kea posted a blog post

Dr. Aseem Malhotra's Explosive Court Testimony on COVID "Vaccines"(UPDATED)

 Doctor Malhotra drops arsenal of truth bombs on Helsinki. A spectacular display. Here are few snip…See More
yesterday
Less Prone favorited Doc Vega's blog post They Want to Murder Trump!
yesterday
Less Prone posted a photo
yesterday
rlionhearted_3 posted a photo
yesterday
Doc Vega posted blog posts
Monday
Doc Vega commented on tjdavis's photo
Thumbnail

reminders

"Wow how ironic! "
Sunday
Less Prone commented on KLC's group MUSICWARS
"Walk like a Joe Biden"
Sunday
Less Prone favorited Sandy's photo
Sunday
Less Prone favorited cheeki kea's photo
Sunday
Less Prone replied to MAC's discussion GAIN OF FUNCTION CRIMINALS ARE SQUIRMING
Sunday
Sandy posted photos
Sunday

© 2024   Created by truth.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service

content and site copyright 12160.info 2007-2019 - all rights reserved. unless otherwise noted