How does someone continue to wake up day after day, knowing that they are Not the Person they knew they should be?

Any simple task that once took 20 minutes to do, is now too exhausting to think about?

Any major task becomes out of the question.

Afraid to answer to phone.

Afraid to answer the door.

Anxiety ridden to the max.

Paranoid.

Hallucinatory.

In Pain.

And your skin, well, you just don’t want anyone getting that close to you.

You learn to adjust your personal standards so that you still feel like you’re partially human. Cover those imperfections.

But, you look human! No-one “sees” anything that wrong with you!

Aren’t we the epitome of a “visual” society?

 If it looks good, it must be good…..Right?……WRONG!

You know you’ve got your work cut out for you, when even your lawyer says “you look fine! You still

“seem” to work, so what can be that wrong with you?”.

Little do people realize, private people do not divulge their full realm of feelings to ANYONE!  Suffering in

silence. Hiding the pain. Too proud to tell anyone that your work life is a revolving door of new employers,

because you just keep “screwing-up“. Looking for jobs that can accommodate your deficiencies. They become

fewer and fewer as time goes on!

But, you learn to appreciate each and every “GOOD” day!

You learn to appreciate a whole heck of a lot of things that you never used to.

You learn to accept things,  that you never normally would have.

And; you learn to appreciate the people that give you a chance.

Then, you learn to fight back!

I remember having tripped over my own feet and hitting my head on the door casing. One HUGE black eye!

A friend came over to check on me shortly after this, and when she saw me, she went “hysterical”. She thought someone

had beaten me! When I finally calmed her down, she tried to hug me….(desperately needed), but the pain was unbearable!

Never underestimate the power of a HUG!

Just the thought of someone “wanting” or “trying” to give you a hug is so uplifting!  As most people today really couldn’t

care less about how anyone else is feeling. Sure, they ask “how are you today”?, but do they REALLY CARE?…..Rarely!

You know things are tough when a relative gives you “what-for” because you didn’t mail them a yearly Christmas card.

Ooops! Who has Christmas? I don’t!  Everything just becomes “another day”! And holidays become days to sleep. You have

no strength no energy, and if you did, you’d only hurt more. So, make the best of the situation, and just answer the

phone, whenever it rings, and pretend like you’re having a good time. That way, you don’t drain yourself by having to

explain the gory details of your disdainful life.

What really got my goat;  I DO Not understand why NO-ONE questioned my neglect to do “what I normally did?”

Not once, did anyone call and say “hey, I didn’t receive a card, is everything okay?”. Instead it’s easier to

play victim.  But, then again, maybe they have a little paranoia going on as well????? (always look for symptoms..)

And, when your mother calls, every few weeks, just to hear your “shining voice”. You finally get up the nerve to tell her you’re sick.

She’s older, she doesn’t really understand, but says “okay”. Then she says something really unusual like “well, it’s Friday, are you going out

tonight?”.  Yep, You Sure Do Look Fine!……So you must be Fine!

And, yet another. This ones a real kicker! At least to me.

Being that I was always health minded. Tried to eat “right”, watched my weight, exercised. One of my hobbies was to read

almost anything I could get my hands on about “health”. To have, yet another caring relative (no less), say “how did

you get so sick, if you always did “everything so healthy!”

How does one answer that? You don’t!  This is definitely one of those statements that falls into the category of “SHUT DOWNS”.

How do you explain to a lay person that all your health issues came as a result of vaccines, medications, chemicals in food

and water, insect bites , etc, etc.

No!  You don’t explain anything!  You’ll just exhaust yourself.  Energy is precious.  Don’t waste it!

What you do, do, however; Is teach these people about the hazards of the aforementioned. Then, sit back and wait for the

phone calls, the fall-outs,  telling you that they just had a tetanus vaccine, and now have a rash; or they took their dog in for it’s

 yearly shots, and it Died a week later!  (this is where you really start to scare people!  What you know is in direct opposition to

what they have been told their ENTIRE LIVES!….)

I had a friend, a very nice person, but way too vain.  She avoided telling me about her “Botox” injections. I happen to

overhear about it and asked her why she didn’t tell me. Her response; “I already know what you’re going to say“. She was

once a healthy, active individual.  Never a sick day. Guess what?  (The symptoms may wax and wane, but they are there!)

People DO NOT want to listen to anyone that is not of the”collective consciousness”. The brain-washed. The manipulated!

Those WAKE-UP calls can be LETHAL!

There are always three sides to every story…..YOURS…..MINE……THE TRUTH!…..

Please learn to look at the source of your information, and ask yourself…..

“WHO WILL GAIN FROM THIS?”

(the best question I ever asked myself!)

Always Remember; “Whatever Doesn’t Kill Us, Makes Us Stronger”!

We are Here for a Purpose.   So, Let’s Make it Count!