The FBI and the Secret Service showed their willingness today to utilize the expanded definitions of “counterfeit currency” and “domestic terrorism” brought about by the recent conviction of Bernard von NotHaus of the alternative currency outlet “Liberty Dollar” when the agencies initiated a surprise raid on an unsuspecting Chuck E. Cheese establishment in Des Moines, Iowa. “Haven’t you ever been at the laundry mat with a pocket of change thinking you have plenty of quarters, only to discover that most of them are Chuck E. Cheese tokens?!” railed Anne Tompkins, Department of Justice prosecutor in the Liberty Dollar case, as she read from a carefully prepared DHS script. “That is close enough to counterfeiting for me! It is a blatant destabilization of our democratic economy! What are you supposed to do, let your underpants wallow in filth while Chuck E. Cheese makes a profit? I say no to these financial terrorists!” MORE>>>

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 The above news story is a parody.