Planned Parenthood Defends Bill Cosby: ‘Sexual Assault Is Only 3% Of What He Does’ (Satire)

NEW YORK, NY—While almost nobody is willing to defend Bill Cosby any longer after he was convicted of sexual assault Thursday, the former television star and comedian found an ally in abortion provider Planned Parenthood.

President Cecile Richards came forward to claim that since sexual assault is only about 3% of what Bill Cosby performed over his long and illustrious career, the egregious offenses should be overlooked.

“Look, guys, let’s keep this in perspective,” she said in a press conference held at Planned Parenthood’s New York offices. “Cosby provided many needed services, like laughter, stand-up comedy, and a solid sitcom. You can’t paint him with the broad brush of ‘sexual offender’ just because a very small percentage of his activities were horrifying and abusive.”

In order to arrive at the cited 3% figure, Planned Parenthood staticions counted every seemingly insignificant interaction with a woman Cosby had, such as walking past a woman without sexually assaulting her or exchanging a few words with a co-worker. Then, they took the number of times he sexually assaulted women and divided it by the former figure, arriving at “approximately 3%.”

“You make people laugh for years, and then you sexually assault a few percent of the people you interact with, and suddenly you’re a sexual predator? Not on our watch,” Richards said.

http://babylonbee.com/news/planned-parenthood-defends-bill-cosby-se...

Views: 92

Reply to This

"Destroying the New World Order"

TOP CONTENT THIS WEEK

THANK YOU FOR SUPPORTING THE SITE!

mobile page

12160.info/m

12160 Administrators

 

Latest Activity

Less Prone favorited Doc Vega's blog post How Hollywood Sci Fi Predicted the Future?
18 hours ago
Doc Vega posted blog posts
yesterday
Less Prone commented on Doc Vega's blog post Your Arrival on Planet Earth
"So sad to see a nice place be ruined by its inhabitants.... It's that shitholeness spreading…"
yesterday
Doc Vega commented on tjdavis's blog post Under An Ionized Sky
"Jesus Christ this is more diabolical than just about anything I've studied even though I knew…"
yesterday
Doc Vega commented on Doc Vega's blog post Your Arrival on Planet Earth
"Less Prone Nothing wrong with the planet. It's the inhabitants who are the problem."
yesterday
tjdavis's 2 blog posts were featured
yesterday
Doc Vega's 5 blog posts were featured
yesterday
Less Prone commented on Doc Vega's blog post Your Arrival on Planet Earth
"That assignment on the blue planet intrigued me a lot. And here we are now! I cannot say it's…"
yesterday
Less Prone favorited Doc Vega's blog post Your Arrival on Planet Earth
yesterday
Burbia's blog post was featured

Sebastion Piñera and 5G

 Sebastion Piñera “The start of the bidding process for the 5G network. Let’s listen to the threats…See More
yesterday
tjdavis favorited Burbia's video
Thursday
tjdavis favorited Sandy's discussion Sick sci-fi sex fantasy written by Epstein's first benefactor people say inspired his twisted island... before author's SON ended up arresting him
Thursday
tjdavis posted a blog post
Thursday
tjdavis posted videos
Wednesday
Doc Vega posted blog posts
Tuesday
Doc Vega commented on Doc Vega's blog post To Each and every One of you here Happy Thanksgiving
"cheeki kea that was damn funny and cute. Always appreciate your insights and memes! Wish I had a…"
Tuesday
Ray99kibz left a comment for Less Prone
"Thanks I am glad to be here."
Monday
alux junes posted a status
"??"
Monday
Elementisfire left a comment for Less Prone
"Sorry for the long wait"
Monday
Elementisfire and Less Prone are now friends
Monday

© 2025   Created by truth.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service

content and site copyright 12160.info 2007-2019 - all rights reserved. unless otherwise noted