Planned Parenthood Defends Bill Cosby: ‘Sexual Assault Is Only 3% Of What He Does’ (Satire)

NEW YORK, NY—While almost nobody is willing to defend Bill Cosby any longer after he was convicted of sexual assault Thursday, the former television star and comedian found an ally in abortion provider Planned Parenthood.

President Cecile Richards came forward to claim that since sexual assault is only about 3% of what Bill Cosby performed over his long and illustrious career, the egregious offenses should be overlooked.

“Look, guys, let’s keep this in perspective,” she said in a press conference held at Planned Parenthood’s New York offices. “Cosby provided many needed services, like laughter, stand-up comedy, and a solid sitcom. You can’t paint him with the broad brush of ‘sexual offender’ just because a very small percentage of his activities were horrifying and abusive.”

In order to arrive at the cited 3% figure, Planned Parenthood staticions counted every seemingly insignificant interaction with a woman Cosby had, such as walking past a woman without sexually assaulting her or exchanging a few words with a co-worker. Then, they took the number of times he sexually assaulted women and divided it by the former figure, arriving at “approximately 3%.”

“You make people laugh for years, and then you sexually assault a few percent of the people you interact with, and suddenly you’re a sexual predator? Not on our watch,” Richards said.

http://babylonbee.com/news/planned-parenthood-defends-bill-cosby-se...

Views: 93

Reply to This

"Destroying the New World Order"

TOP CONTENT THIS WEEK

THANK YOU FOR SUPPORTING THE SITE!

mobile page

12160.info/m

12160 Administrators

 

Latest Activity

Less Prone favorited tjdavis's video
27 minutes ago
Burbia commented on Burbia's group The Comment Section is Closed
13 hours ago
tjdavis posted a video

The Geography of Iran Explained.

Hey Everyone,This is my attempt to humanize the people and country of Iran. I hope I can educate people on the geography of this country outside of what we ...
19 hours ago
cheeki kea commented on Doc Vega's blog post Regrets That Cling to Me
"An awesome poem for the day. It is actually World Poetry Day a special day granted by UNESCO to…"
21 hours ago
cheeki kea favorited Doc Vega's blog post Regrets That Cling to Me
22 hours ago
Doc Vega commented on Doc Vega's blog post A Cure for Cancer?
"cheek kea thanks you so much. Yes, I agree, but there was so much espionage, mistrust, and military…"
Wednesday
cheeki kea commented on Doc Vega's blog post A Cure for Cancer?
"Yes I believe there's a Cure or Remedy for everything. As netizens across the world start to…"
Wednesday
Doc Vega posted a blog post

A Cure for Cancer?

 How many of you have agonized over seeing little kids at St. Jude’s Hospital with brain cancer,…See More
Tuesday
Евеліна posted a blog post

Розумний дім: як технології роблять життя комфортнішим

Що таке розумний дімРозумний дім — це система сучасних технологій, яка дозволяє автоматизувати…See More
Tuesday
Less Prone commented on tjdavis's photo
Thumbnail

Shabby Road

"Total disregard of public places. Import it to the west and call it enrichment. "
Mar 15
tjdavis posted a photo
Mar 15
Doc Vega posted a blog post
Mar 14
Less Prone favorited Doc Vega's photo
Mar 13
Less Prone commented on rlionhearted_3's photo
Thumbnail

What the fuck?

"When will the perverts picked out of the government and positions of power for thorough…"
Mar 13
Less Prone favorited Doc Vega's blog post The Re-Evaluation of our Current Reality
Mar 13
Less Prone favorited Doc Vega's blog post Former Naval Physicist and Photo Analyst Bruce Maccabee’s Wife Sees Alien Predator!
Mar 13
Doc Vega's 6 blog posts were featured
Mar 13
cheeki kea's blog post was featured
Mar 13
james will's 2 blog posts were featured
Mar 13
Less Prone left a comment for Роман
"Welcome on board. Your input is welcome, but could you provide a translation in…"
Mar 13

© 2026   Created by truth.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service

content and site copyright 12160.info 2007-2019 - all rights reserved. unless otherwise noted