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It was 6:30 am. I was asleep. The dog wanted out anyway… AND she was showing off her legs in the process.
Mostly by stepping on my head, but that’s beside the point. The licking and yipping in my ear was pure bonus, as far as she was concerned.
I had no choice, right?
So got up and wandered to the patio door. It was a fresh new dawn outside, just first-light. The birds were chirping, the squirrels were gamboling around on the lawn and fences...
No problem, right?
Then the dog slipped out between my legs and all hell broke loose.
The neighbors got to see a rare treat today; 6am and me outside in my underwear swearing at the squirrels to get the hell out of my garden while trying to stop my sweet little furry girl from adding to the nasty little collection of corpses she has buried out there.
Plus we have ice patches back there still. Frost is slippery, people Trust me..
So I limp back in finally… AFTER the world was made safe from marauding squirrels and hurting my vocal cords.
I control the whimpering with coffee kick up the news on the box. Traffic lights are now revenue centers. Light times are being messed with, the city needs the revenues.
Yellow ones, naturally.
24/7 speed traps are being set up in all school zones this year. That 25K speed limit will be STRICTLY enforced with photo radar.
The red light cameras will be used to catch smokers… both with kids in the car and outside. (You aren’t allowed within so many feet of a doorway around here.)
Poop and scoop will be photo’ed too.. And dogs using the post is frowned on.
(I keep getting a picture of a very sad looking guy standing beside a lamp post, a bag in one hand while his dog, looking blissful, is leaning a leg against the post. And the lamp post is yelling at him.)
The fare checkers on the bus were taking ID’s for handing out warnings today too… and your surprise ticket is what came back.
So happy April 1st, people.
I’m NOT telling which is which here. Being all wrapped up in politics with my cat, (I’ve spent a life-time trying to out-quick the beasties) death by gossip is looking like the easy way out right now.
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