Penis Size Shrinking Due To Environmental Pollution. (Poll) (Rated R for Mature Subject Matter)

Renowned scientist Louis Guillette announced research today indicating that pesticide pollution is causing a reduction in penis size and increasing the numbers of male genital abnormalities due to chemical similarity to estrogen.  In his penetrating report, Pesticides may affect penis size, John Miner tells us that:


A renowned U.S. scientist who has documented fertility and sex changes -- including decreasing penis size -- due to environmental contamination says he wouldn't apply pesticides on his own lawn.

Delivering a special series of lectures this week at the University of Western Ontario, Louis Guillette has been drawn into London's lawn-care debate during question periods and talk-show interviews.

Size of Problem Unknown

In his alarming report, Guillette warns that sufficient evidence already exists that we should be refraining from use of these pesticides for cosmetic purposes such as home lawn care. I wish I was a stock market person. If any of you make a bundle selling Ortho Lawn Care products short, I hope you will kindly remember me bringing this to your attention.  

All we need is one commercial from the Sierra Club with a fellow mowing his beautiful lawn and saying, "yes, my penis has shriveled up to the size of a clitoris, but my lawn looks terrific don't you think? And is sad looking wife looking glum as she shakes her head in disbelief. But the incredible shrinking penis problem is no laughing matter.  

"The use of these compounds just for cosmetic reasons, just because you don't want to make dandelion wine from your yard or whatever, I think is inappropriate," Guillette, who is associate dean for research at the University of Florida, said in a lecture yesterday at UWO's Schulich School of Medicine and Dentistry.

Based on his own scientific investigations, Guillette said there's enough evidence pesticides put children, wildlife and the ecosystem at risk.

"Just because you can go buy them at the local stores doesn't meant that is appropriate use," he said.

A zoologist, Guillette has spent the last decade studying the influence of environmental contaminants on fetal development and reproductive systems of wildlife and humans, including the differences between alligators living in contaminated Florida lakes and those in cleaner ones.

Penis Size Is Shrinking In Alligators and Humans.

I thought I had a tough job.  Can you imagine the poor folks who have to wake up each morning for a long day of measuring the length of Alligator penises? Do they measure them just flaccid or erect as well. I imagine the latter is the much more significant aspect of this terrible problem.  

But how exactly does one sex up an alligator?  This is obviously a two person job.  The first researcher needs to dress up like a female alligator and waggle that tail in the most flirtatious way possible.  Then just as the male alligator is ready to make his moves, the second researcher jump in with the measuring tape.  Yes, I think I may have seen a show on this with that Australian fellow in it.  

Now I understand what all this alligator wrestling was all about.  Before it seemed sort of silly.  But this is consequential research that I fully support.

He found abnormalities in sex organs, dramatic differences in egg-hatching rates and hormone levels.

Penis size of the animals from the polluted lake was smaller than animals from the less-polluted lake.

"This is important because it is not just an alligator story. It is not just a lake story. We know there has been a dramatic increase in penile and genital abnormalities in baby boys," Guillette said.

A follow up study by another scientist involving healthy couples with 5,000 healthy babies also found reduced penis size with higher contamination levels.

As if men didn't already have enough excuses not to mow the lawns on weekends.  LOL  Sorry that's a bad joke.  This is an issue the unite the genders in common concern.

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FUTURE EXCUSE: Not tonight honey......You know i was brought up on GM's and supermarket foods.....

Ahahahahahaaaa!

off site comment: fuck climate change... spread this story and emissions will drop right quick. you can say the planet is doomed all you want, but tiny mangled dicks is a different story. "get those windmills up NOW!"

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