Differently?

There was a time I thought I could make a difference

Without any false pretense

Perhaps even with a little magnificence

Seems now all things are in past tense,

It wasn’t just my imagination

Though it may have stemmed from frustration

For once to live without self-recrimination

Maybe I was guilty of procrastination,

I keep paddling down this river of memory

That flows through non-existent geology

Flooding with emotions as they move out to the sea

Having little leverage against destiny,

Love forever lost leaves these scars

Like the impression left in the backseat of a car

A lack of planning that won’t go far

Difference between failure and a super star,

A humanitarian cause to feather my cap

Taken down by an assassin’s bullet with a slap

Between reality and delusion there seems to be a gap

The tenderness of a baby on your lap,

Though I could have made a difference

Perhaps I could have used some deliverance

What difference did it make with my repentance?

Perhaps it was the draining effect of the severance?

For I am but a ship alone on the nocturnal sea

Only the lack of storms permitting me

Passing in the shadow of night silently

Wondering had I done things differently?