Do not try to adjust your TV set. For now we will control the vertical. We will control the horizontal. Now sit quietly as we take a great adventure that will take us to the Outer Limits! 

You See! All that crap about dangers of the vax was BS. Now hand me a mirror! 

When they said Biden caused supply shortages I didn't think it would be over toilet paper! Dear God look at my hands! 

Listen to me you fool! Don't take the vax. Don't take the booster shot. Don't believe them. look what it did to me! 

It appears that the human dung sample from the streets of San Francisco matches up perfectly with the samples from Los Angeles!

Reporting for work to flip burgers being that no one wants to work for minimum wage! Show me the grill! I'm perfectly programmed.

Yes! I knew we'd catch Hunter Biden smoking crack again! You see my surveillance device works exceptionally well! 

C'mon! Do you think we're going to let your present that evidence of voter fraud? Get real!

So, it's true! Biden is an idiot and America is fucked! 

Come on toots! I got a surprise for you! Let's go in the Women's restroom! That department store over there! 

Yuh know I used to be a Democrat. Then I realized I was just being an asshole! 

I've got to get this wet diaper off my head there's a conference here in 2 minutes. It won't look good on the White House cameras! 

So what's it gonna be Buddy. Are you going to take the vax or are we going have to do this the hard way?

Ha ha! First they fell for the pandemic BS and now we're going to stick the kids! What a perfect plot. Think I'll go dive into my favorite vat of urine! 

Do you really recommend Critical Race Theory for the school children?

We here at the FBI have been maintaining surveillance on these mothers and fathers confronting the school boards all right! 

Yes, we are the ones in the shadows. The Swamp. The ones who tell Biden what destructive policies to enact! 

I swear to God officers I did not put tooling oil in those milkshakes. By the way, are those little bastards alright?

So you're telling me it's either get the vax or wear this suit if I go out in public any place?

We figured you've had enough by now. We now return you to your normal programming until next time!