Did you think that a potential partner would be perfect for you if they were your mirror image? Ever wonder how the saying, “Opposites attract,” but in reality the true statement should be, “Opposites attract but soon break apart.” Why is this? A mirror image may seem to be a perfect replication of you as you stand there looking at your reflection, but it is a juxtaposed image. Ever wondered why when having words on a T-shirt you’re wearing the letters appear backwards in the mirror? The same is true in the fabric of who you are. The strengths and weaknesses you have are inverse to the mirror image of your other behalf.

What happened?

Haven’t you wondered why that after that initial euphoria in a relationship suddenly the things you were able to overlook become insurmountable or the flaws you were able to tolerate became major hindrances in the relationship? You then ask yourself how you were ever attracted to the person in the first place. In the spirit realm the souls of the weak and opportunistic will often feed on the energy given off by those pure in heart and more capable. What does this do to the enlightened? It often forces them into confrontations they don’t deserve or were not intending to enter into. Remember how it was meeting your failed significant other in the very beginning? She was giving off hints you probably ignored before the relationship started. You may not have even liked her initially, but time and contact changed all that into an ill-advised union destined not to last, but all sparkles at first.

Attraction or failure

What went wrong? She was attracted to your strengths just as you were to hers. Yet, the weaknesses of both parties were the prelude to failure. Being attracted to opposites does not often lead to harmony, but rather conflict. For instance, if she is restless and impatient, is your virtue of consideration for others going to be enough to compliment the relationship? Probably not. If you are a very passionate lover will you be able to tolerate someone who has been abused, violated, and have a deeply seated fear of intimacy? Most likely not, but still your former partner sought you out because you had a strength and courage in that capacity they didn’t have. However, these off setting virtues and shortcomings became a point of conflict rather than becoming a melded together completion that benefits both souls.

A joke or a prediction?

I once heard someone tell the newly united couple jokingly that what made him seem so funny and charming now would be the very thing that drove her crazy in the end! This was only the sarcasm that could be tolerated between brothers, not strangers or acquaintances, but it equates exactly what the outcome will often be for the mirror image seeking couple. Especially, if one partner is smitten with a constant feeling of being out of control while the other party feels secure and confident the majority of the time. Throw in such psychological chemistry as bi-polar and or obsessive compulsive behavior and you have an insurmountable mountain to climb. Add that to today’s commitment phobia and immediate impulse for self-gratification and we can see why relationships today don’t last.  

Old adages don’t suffice

In some cases two mirror image couples can work it out and can accept what virtues are carried by one partner but lacking in the other. It takes work and mutual respect to overcome those obstacles, but we have been led astray over such things with the traditional sayings such as, “Love conquers all,” or “Absence makes the heart grow fonder,” that must have been a saying meant for another generation far removed from today.

Final thought

With all the dysfunction prevalent now in families, one might wonder if the only outcome that can expected is that every adult will most likely have one, two, or three divorces in their lifetime which isn’t much of a promising proposition. Divorces break the hearts of children who blame themselves and grow up searching desperately for a spirit who seems to offer a safe harbor. In the words of one mental health researcher, “we are all wounded children,” may be more accurate than one would think. The question becomes, can we find ways to adapt that are healthy and not self-defeating? Is there any family that isn’t dysfunctional in some ways so that it’s passed on to the children who will one day be adults? That’s a good question.