Five Reasons Israel Blocks Items from Entering Gaza that You Thought were Safe – (Satire)

1. Musical instruments

Let's face it, nothing annoys anyone more than neighbors that play their music too loud.

During the Vietnam war the U.S. Would use frequency generators and amplifiers to play 'the brown note' into the V.C. tunnels before sending in the tunnel rats. The tunnel rats were soldiers who would enter the tunnels and hunt the V.C. who they would come upon while they were experiencing explosive diareah, the effect of the frequency called 'the brown note'Just imagine how things would go sour for you if you were an IDF soldier kicking down a door in Gaza and suddenly the terrorist family of Hamas supporters living there smacks you in the face with the Macarena played on the accordion, bagpipes, and a cowbell. You'd be pooping your mamma's matsa balls in your pants before you'd even digested them.

Musical instruments are obviously serious weapons of mass pant pooping.

2. Crayons

The young whipper snapper millennials will never understand but some of us grew up watching the world's greatest educational programming, Loony Tunes. We might not remember the preamble to the constitution without singing it the 'Schoolhouse Rock' way that hit us in between cartoons but we sure as hell remember how drawing a train tunnel in a cliff face can bring a train out to try and run over our enemies (just don't try to enter the tunnel yourself) and a hole drawn on the ceiling can drop an acme anvil on top of someone's head.

Physics can be weird. Thank God Loony Tunes has taught us the way.

,.. and the word.

3. Cookies

Cookies are a great treat unless they are burnt. That wouldn't happen in a metal shipping container under the middle eastern sun would it? Of course it would. Even famous Amos isn't as black as the cookies shipped into Gaza.

I bet you think these briquets would only sadden the children of Gaza, but you'd be wrong. You see, not only are these cookies as black as a politician's morals, they are also hard as a rock and Palestinian children often throw rocks at Israeli soldiers. It's obviously better if Hamas Jr has to use native Palastinian rocks because at least that way Israel gets more of their land even if it's only one stone at a time.

Even if that's not enough evidence to wake you up to cookie dangers, check out this News report about Iran's female ninja warriors.

None of the news anchors even noticed when reporting this story but Hamas friendlly Iran has really excelled in weaponized cookie development.

4. Fishing rods

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man how to build cybernetic weaponized sharks and you've given him a way to kill you.

The advances in genetic science and robotics are coming to life even as we speak. With just a Roomba and some genetic samples taken from the ocean even you could do it in your basement. I mean not like now, or actually you but, you know,... if you were actually smart.

Even if you have no enemies just try to tell me you wouldn't want a sleek toothy death machine of a land shark like this parked in your garage. I knew you couldn't.

5. Industrial margarine

Thanks to this Palestinian nursery rhyme Israel has had to block butter shipments into Gaza for hundreds of years.

'Betty Ahmad bought some butter, but, she said, The butter's bitter; If I put it in my jihad, It will make my jihad bitter. But, a bit of better butter will make my jihad better. So, she bought a bit of butter better than her bitter butter, and she put it in her jihad and the jihad was not bitter. So, twas better Betty Ahmad bought a bit of better anti-semitism.'

Try saying that without one of their forked Arab tongues!

Although margarine has been around for hundreds of years it gained a much greater market share in the 1980s and this is where things get terroristy. That was at the same time as miracle toast started to appear throughout the United States. A coincidence? Doubtful.


Surely you BDS freaks think it's silly to ban a divine miracle from Gaza but who are God's chosen people? Is it them? Is it you? Is it the Chinese? Is it the left handed lesbian Eskimo midget albinos? No way Jose!

Views: 301

Comment

You need to be a member of 12160 Social Network to add comments!

Join 12160 Social Network

"Destroying the New World Order"

TOP CONTENT THIS WEEK

THANK YOU FOR SUPPORTING THE SITE!

mobile page

12160.info/m

12160 Administrators

 

Latest Activity

Doc Vega commented on tjdavis's video
Thumbnail

The Hunt - Official Trailer [HD]

"A former ANTIFA member was interviewed here recently and this would not be far from actual reality…"
yesterday
Doc Vega posted blog posts
yesterday
tjdavis posted videos
Monday
tjdavis posted a blog post
Monday
tjdavis posted a photo
Monday
Doc Vega posted a blog post

Legacy of Supposedly Inferior Aircraft Outmatching Their Enemies

 We think of the Korean War aerial combat as the classic dogfights between the American F-86 Sabre…See More
Saturday
Doc Vega commented on tjdavis's blog post Cities,States Without Limits
"This is just another form of a feudal globalism dictated by corporate technocrats bragging about…"
Saturday
Doc Vega favorited tjdavis's blog post Cities,States Without Limits
Saturday
Doc Vega posted a blog post

What is Area 2 and What Goes on There?

 We have all heard of Area 51 and S-4, along with such terms as Water Town, Papoose Lake,…See More
Friday
Doc Vega posted a blog post

STRANGE THINGS HAPPENING IN YELLOWSTONE

It’s not the fact that Yellowstone National Park sits atop a super volcano that hasn’t erupted in…See More
Thursday
tjdavis posted a video

Austrian police raid house of man who leaked Israeli ambassador video making genocidal comments

In a new ITV documentary, Breaking Ranks: Inside Israel’s War, former Israeli soldiers describe how Gaza civilians were killed, often without warning, in an ...
Nov 20
Burbia posted a video

WARHAMMER 40,000 | 1980's GRIMDARK MOVIE

WARHAMMER 40,000 | 1980's GRIMDARK MOVIEThis is a Concept Movie Trailer made with the help of AI. This video is created purely for fun and out of curiosity a...
Nov 19
tjdavis favorited Sandy's discussion Sick sci-fi sex fantasy written by Epstein's first benefactor people say inspired his twisted island... before author's SON ended up arresting him
Nov 19
tjdavis favorited Sandy's discussion Sick sci-fi sex fantasy written by Epstein's first benefactor people say inspired his twisted island... before author's SON ended up arresting him
Nov 19
tjdavis commented on tjdavis's blog post THE ORIGINS OF THE WORLD ASSOCIATION OF SOCIAL PSYCHIATRY IN LONDON, UK IN 1964
"Tavistock Timing"
Nov 19
tjdavis posted a blog post
Nov 19
Doc Vega posted a blog post

The Ringside View

Down in the streets where the animals meetWhere tear gas flies and people get beatWhere…See More
Nov 19
tjdavis posted videos
Nov 18
tjdavis posted blog posts
Nov 17
Doc Vega posted a blog post

Is America on the brink of a Dire Emergency

 You might know if you have remained informed that America has been under asymmetric warfare for…See More
Nov 15

© 2025   Created by truth.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service

content and site copyright 12160.info 2007-2019 - all rights reserved. unless otherwise noted