Text/Audiobook: http://www.fdrurl.com/HHO

Audiobook: http://www.fdrurl.com/HHO_Audio

If you are reading this, it means that you have ascended to the highest levels of government, so it's really, really important that you don't do or say anything stupid, and screw things up for the rest of us.

The first thing to remember is that you are a figurehead, about as relevant to the direction of the state as a hood ornament is to the direction of a car -- but you are a very important distraction, the "smiling face" of the fist of power. So hold your nose, kiss the babies, and just think how good you would look on a stamp.

Now, before we go into your media responsibilities, you must understand the true history of political power, so you don't accidentally act on the naive idealism you are required to project to the general public.

THE REALITY OF POLITICAL POWER IS VERY SIMPLE: BAD FARMERS OWN CROPS AND LIVESTOCK -- GOOD FARMERS OWN HUMAN BEINGS.